411 Slices
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Medium 9781574412444

1. Favorite Toys

Peggy Heinkel-Wolfe University of North Texas Press PDF

line of yellow beads up and down the thick, cherry-red wire mounted on a sturdy pine base. She sat next to him and began to narrate his play in the same quiet, deliberate way she had first talked with me on the phone. I had seen that kind of toy only a few times before. Even as an adult, I found moving the beads felt soothing and purposeful.

“Look, Sam, you’re making those yellow beads go up and down. You’re making them go up. Now you’re letting them fall down. That’s fun, Sam,” Nancy said.

She turned to me.

“Just describe what he’s doing. He’ll make the connections between the words you’re using and what they’re for. This toy is good for eye-hand coordination and visual tracking—the kind of motor skills he will need to learn to read.”

I began to wonder whether I was Sam’s problem. Of course,

Sam wasn’t talking because I wasn’t a chatty mother. My quiet love wasn’t enough. I should be walking up and down the aisles of the grocery store going on about red apples, and green peas, and orange oranges, I thought. That must be why he doesn’t know his colors. I didn’t coo. I didn’t baby talk. I didn’t refer to myself in the third person.

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Medium 9781855753693

CHAPTER TWELVE. The bodies of present-day maternity

Alcira Mariam Alizade Karnac Books ePub

Leticia Glocer Fiorini


When we discuss motherhood in the twenty-first century we must take into consideration the ramifications of creating life in a non-conventional way. This in turn leads us to reflect on the vertiginous progress of bio-technology as an expression of present-day culture. Psychoanalysis is being challenged on its very frontiers. We need to consider the full implications and limits of these technologies, as well as their impact on analysts and patients. This puts the psychoanalytic method to the test.

The objective is to delimit the new relationships between technology the human body and subjectivity; to investigate the impact of these new reproductive techniques on body representations, on traditional representations of the female body, of sexuality, of motherhood, and on the role of men and women in procreation.

The effects will depend on the particular features of each case and the specific characteristics of the techniques used. I emphasize the differences that exist between the simplest techniques, involving both members of a heterosexual couple, and the most complex ones, in which several bodies participate (gamete donor, surrogate womb, nursing mother). We must now add cloning, already established in the social imaginary and getting closer to becoming a reality.

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Medium 9781576755846

12 Germs of Warfare

The Arbiner Institute Berrett-Koehler Publishers ePub

“Justification has some telltale signs,” Yusuf began. “I’ve already mentioned a few—how we begin horribilizing others, for example. In fact, that sign is a subset of a whole category of signs that you might think of as exaggerations. When our hearts are at war, we tend to exaggerate others’ faults; that’s what we call horribilizing. We also tend to exaggerate the differences between ourselves and those we are blaming. We see little in common with them, when the reality is that we are similar in many if not most respects. We also exaggerate the importance of anything that will justify us. If I had had an appointment around the time Mordechai spilled his coins, for example, it would have suddenly seemed critical that I get to it. If I had happened to be carrying a book with me, I might have suddenly felt the need to bury my nose in it and start reading. Whenever we need to be justified, anything that will give us justification will immediately take on exaggerated importance in our life. Self-betrayal corrupts everything—even the value we place on things.

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CHAPTER NINE. Maternity and femininity: sharing and splitting in the mother-daughter relationship

Alcira Mariam Alizade Karnac Books ePub

Florence Guignard


Conceptualizing the specific features of the mother-daughter relationship from a psychoanalytic point of view means that we have to refer constantly to what we can learn from our clinical work and to distinguish at all times between manifest and latent, visible and invisible, phallic and genital, maternal and feminine; this is the only way to confirm or to invalidate the metapsychological hypotheses that are still being worked out.

On the biological side, the role of gender identity in instinctual drive organization (Guignard, 1997a) should be noted; on the social side, the part played by the prevalent group mentality (Bion, 1961) and its characteristic features in the complex problem-set that accompanies parental cathexis of an infant boy as a distinct from an infant girl must also be taken into account.

Unlike boys, girls have to change their love object if their Oedipal development is to proceed. The upheaval generated by the discovery of her love for the father puts a daughter in a situation of dangerous rivalry with respect to the original love object, her mother.

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Medium 9781576752456

CHAPTER 7: What about Fluffy and Fido?

John de Graaf Berrett-Koehler Publishers ePub

I have to admit it. Despite years of interest in the issue of overwork and time pressure, I’d never given a thought to its impact on animals. But when talking to an old friend about Take Back Your Time Day, she told me that “this issue is even important to pets.” In her affluent California community, the fastest growing business was professional doggy-walking! “Sometimes you see a person being pulled down the street by five or six dogs,” she said. “People are so busy they have no time for their pets.” I called Camilla Fox, a friend and professional animal advocate for confirmation of animal neglect due to overwork. She agreed that it was a growing problem and offered to write something about it. —JdG

Often, pets are our best barometers—reflecting our mental and physical state of being. My dog Zaela, for example, is my daily gauge. If you want to know how I’m feeling today, just look at my ever-present four-legged companion. When Zaela is grinning and wagging her tail, you can be pretty sure I’m in a good mood. A forlorn, listless Zaela, however, may indicate it’s not the best day to approach me for a raise.

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Medium 9781576750919

PeopleSmart Skill 6

Mel Silberman Berrett-Koehler Publishers ePub

As long as you keep a person down,

some part of you has to be down there to hold him down,

so it means you cannot soar as you otherwise might.


If we invited you to free associate to the word conflict, would you think of war, destruction, divorce, turmoil? Probably many people would. Even as we write this, the effects of conflict cast shadows on the world: children murdered, people hated because they are different, nations torn apart over ethnic and racial feuding. It is hardly surprising that many wish that life could be entirely free of conflict.144

Of course, this is impossible. As long as there are differences among people, there will be conflicts and competing interests. This is not entirely bad: Out of conflicts have come our most enduring institutions, governments, and religions. Nations have all been forged out of the struggle to express our needs, resolve our disputes, and accept our differences. Like sun and rain or day and night, conflict is part of the rhythm of life. Our challenge is to master it and grow through it.

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Medium 9780253350497

6. Philanthropy, Democracy, and the Future

Robert L. Payton Indiana University Press ePub

This chapter provides the final piece of our explanation of why philanthropy exists and, moreover, why it should exist. It describes a vital role of philanthropy in society and considers how to ensure the persistence of that role in the future. The first half discusses how philanthropy is essential to a free, open, and democratic society. The second half looks to the future and considers the need to be good stewards of the tradition of philanthropy and to pass it on through expanded education about philanthropy. Like all traditions, philanthropy in any society must be actively preserved and transmitted, or else it is in jeopardy of decline, a decline that would have far-reaching consequences. Understanding how philanthropy is essential to the sorts of democratic societies that we want is a crucial step in the process of preserving it for the future.

The future of free, open, and democratic societies is directly linked to the vitality of the philanthropic tradition in those societies. It is not possible for a democracy to thrive without a healthy philanthropic sector. This is an important part of the rationale for philanthropy that we present in this book. While we have emphasized elements of this role for philanthropy in previous chapters, we elaborate on these contributions here and consider their constitutional basis and democratic consequences. We illustrate our assertions mostly with reference to the example of how philanthropy helps ensure a healthy democracy in the United States, but similar arguments can be made about other democracies.1

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CHAPTER FOUR. Artificial pregnancy

Alcira Mariam Alizade Karnac Books ePub

Jacqueline Amati Mehler


One of the complex and still debated issues regarding motherhood in the twenty-first century is the variety of reasons that may account for a couple’s sterility and the resources employed to solve it as well as the problems raised by those reasons. The latter inhabits the arena of debate throughout and beyond geographic, ethical, legal, and moral boundaries that I cannot discuss here. Suffice to say that different countries deal with assisted pregnancy in the most varied and contradictory manner, ranging from total flexibility, such as fertilization of singles or homosexual couples, to more repressive rules like exclusion of heterologue insemination or forced insemination of embryos even if genetically damaged. Cultural contexts may have a different impact on the way these issues are dealt with. As Malkah Notman1 reminded me, in one of the international panels held on the subject of assisted pregnancy, 2 the clinical experience and concerns voiced by Europeans differed from those expressed by USA colleagues (personal communication).

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Medium 9781574411904

Chapter 11: Competition

Naomi Scott University of North Texas Press PDF

Chapter Eleven


The impetus for therapeutic horseback riding becoming the organized, worldwide activity we know today, literally originated in the show arena with the courageous lady, Liz Hartel of Denmark.1 Her wellpublicized triumph of overcoming impaired mobility from polio to win a Silver Medal in Grand Pris Dressage at the 1952 Helsinki Olympics is generally credited with calling attention to the rehabilitative merits of riding a horse. A fitting tribute to Hartel is the subsequent spread of therapy programs, and growing participation in competitive equine events by physically and mentally challenged riders.

Psychologically it is a wonderful thing, for those who cannot engage in other sports, to experience the exhilaration of competition. What a boost for the self-esteem, to go back to their school, work and families, and tell about something they can do that their able-bodied friends and relatives cannot do—ride horses, and win medals, belt buckles, trophies, and ribbons.

Opportunities are expanding throughout the continent, in shows held at public or private facilities, and at NARHA centers. Some public shows are exclusively for the challenged, while others are held in conjunction with events for the able-bodied. Most are open to riders in established programs which are affiliated with NARHA, and CanTRA.

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Chapter 26: Ben—Infantile Seizures

Naomi Scott University of North Texas Press PDF

Chapter Twenty-Six

Ben—Infantile Seizures

Hemispherectomy. What a chilling word. Probably one most of us have not heard before. Yes, it means what it sounds like—removing onehalf of the brain.1 Imagine the heartbreak of being told your beautiful two-year-old son needed a hemispherectomy. This is what happened to the parents of Benjamen Schwalls, Michael and Michelle of Fort Worth,

Texas. After hearing of Ben’s dramatic surgery and recovery, I arranged to watch him ride while his father told me his story.

When Ben was about four months old, the Schwalls began noticing unusual body movement and his grandmother thought he might be having mild seizures. The pediatrician diagnosed reflux until two or three months later when the condition worsened and it became apparent that an Electroencephalogram (EEG) was necessary. The test confirmed the baby was having seizures.

“The diagnosis,” Michael Schwalls said, “was infantile spasms, a rare form of seizure. When the doctor gave us the bad news, he threw a lot of percentages at us about what to expect, indicating the disease would likely be debilitating, if not deadly. The cause was never determined, but we were told it was not genetic, therefore we need not be hesitant to have more children.” Schwalls recalled that the unusual activity started shortly after Ben received his second diptheria/pertussis/ tetanus (DPT) shot, but no official connection was made.

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7. First Words

Peggy Heinkel-Wolfe University of North Texas Press PDF

“Okay, thanks,” I called back.

Sam didn’t notice the smoke or the bees. He just went on.

At the end of Y Street, we’d walk past a dusty Chevy

Chevette parked on the other side. The tires on the little blue car were flat and it never moved from its spot. One day, as we walked by the car, a twentysomething man came out of the house and down the porch carrying a baseball bat. With a big swing, he smashed the front windshield. He looked up and seemed surprised to see me and Sam.

“It’s okay,” he called. “It doesn’t run anymore.” My own startled look softened and I smiled. Sometimes, I’d like to put a baseball bat through a car window, I thought. My career’s going nowhere; I’m thirty and pregnant—accidentally, again; and I can’t keep up with the toddler I have.

Sam turned right for a short sprint on Miller Street and right again for the final stretch down Sherman Way. Cutting across our tiny front lawn of Bermuda grass lined with Shasta daisies that were always flopped over, Sam rounded the fragrant, white star jasmine vine I’d planted. He jumped up the stairs to the front door and let himself in. The welcome end of another chase-Sam-around-the-block episode for me. But for

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Medium 9781574415247

Chapter 11. Dancing

Kathryn U. Hulings University of North Texas Press PDF


I know that it is not appropriate to repeatedly scream out in agony

when one of my children is performing in a sold-out, standing-roomonly, high-school talent show. It could easily be misinterpreted as rude.

Or as child abuse. I know this. That, however, doesn’t mean I haven’t done something like that. Or exactly that. I have. I am a middle-aged, overweight, perpetually dorky-acting, potty-mouthed woman who is often in pain, and sometimes, decency be damned, I slip.

For weeks, Michael had been rehearsing for his coveted role in the annual talent show at Rocky Mountain High School in the spring of 2009. It was his junior year, and we had been perpetually listening to the soundtrack from School of Rock as Michael put his body through his original choreographic moves behind the closed door of his bedroom, in front of his full-length mirror. Jim and I watched a couple of his rehearsals—we sat on his twin bed, underneath the life-sized Luke

Skywalker/Han Solo mural. Michael’s stage was the middle of his bedroom, and his music played from a boom-box on his nightstand. In typical Michael fashion, the choreography was . . . flexible—in other words, it was completely different each time. He went with the inspiration of the moment, and we oohed and aahed regardless of the exact steps. Michael had recently been propelled into a milieu that gave him a lot of inspiration.

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Medium 9780870818462


Kevin Holdsworth University Press of Colorado ePub

Darrell “Magpie” Menzies and Richard “Beaver Dick” Martinson worked together in the control room of the massive trona plant at Westvaco. They reenacted together, too, nearly every summer weekend, traveling around to various sites in the state—Hamm’s Fork, Daniel, Pinedale, Ft. Bridger, Casper, to attend rendezvous—to play act, really. And their wives, whom they called “our squaws,” generally joined in the hijinks. Magpie and Beaver Dick’s choice of hobby was intensely embarrassing to their children, who sulked in their RVs, can’t we get any better reception than that? practiced voodoo on little trapper dolls with rubber tomahawks and bags of possibles, prepare to die, Trapper Swine, and dreamed of a life far away from Wyoming. The highlight of the year, though, was the annual hunting trip to the Middle Fork. Magpie and Beaver went alone with only their animals. Smoke rose sinuously into a leaden sky. Magpie and Beaver were enveloped in fast-falling white darkness, in clouds so low and ground-hugging no one would call them clouds. But the smoke did not rise lazily for long. Much to his own delight, and to his partner’s dismay, Beaver Dick stoked and stoked the fire. The flames leapt up, licking back the damp chill. Beaver built a regular white-man’s fire.

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Medium 9781605093482


Blanchard, Ken Berrett-Koehler Publishers ePub
Medium 9781576752456

APPENDIX A: Organizing Take Back Your Time Day in Your Community

John de Graaf Berrett-Koehler Publishers ePub

What will you do in your community to take part in Take Back Your Time Day? Of course, the options are many. The next two sections look at a couple of possibilities. These ideas are meant to be fun and creative, to get your imagination going. Sean Sheehan suggests one way of organizing a community meeting that can be both informative and enjoyable. You can adapt his plan or create your own from scratch. You’ll note that this meeting takes place on Friday evening. It’s for all those people who want to support Take Back Your Time Day, but just don’t feel brave enough to skip work for even part of the day. What might work best is to hold campus teach-ins during the afternoon, and meetings in churches, union halls, and community centers or libraries during the evening. And don’t be afraid to let the events continue the following day—it’sa Saturday, and officially, it’s Make A Difference Day. So you might want to make your difference by hosting a continuation of Take Back Your Time Day events—a community fair with tables, say. Of course, you could also hold your fair on Friday. The point is to make clear that the event is about taking back time. Be sure that it doesn’t end without your getting names and contact information for everyone who attended so you can establish an on-going Take Back Your Time organization and continue to work on the issue. —JdG

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